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Features

  • Today marks the end of National Engineers Week, according to the Internet site, Bizarre, Crazy, Silly Unknown Holidays. Engineers across the country have been celebrating by telling various amusing stories relating to their profession. Our Pun Alley editor, a retired engineer, contributes to the fray with today’s column.

    Sharp Thinking

  • One of my favorite rides at Walt Disney World is the Pirates of the Caribbean. This swashbuckling adventure appeals to the pirate in all of us as you travel through uncharted “waters” encountering storms, ghost ships, naval battles and the ubiquitous countenance of Johnny Depp. Putting the Disney magic aside, it did get me wondering if indeed there were Jewish pirates who roamed the Caribbean in search of treasured prey.

  • The South Marion Citizen asked readers to submit their Valentine love stories. Those received are published today.

    Lois and Vernon Uzzell

    A mutual lady friend aimed Cupid’s bow and arrow at Lois, a 77-year-old widow, and Vernon, an 83-year-old widower.

  • The OTOW Lions Club members are asking residents to help with the relief efforts for the people of Haiti who have been injured and lost all they have in the recent earthquake. The will be collecting the following items.

     

    MEDICAL SUPPLIES

    First aid supplies, Band Aids, gauze, bandages, tape, Ace Bandages, water purification tablets, alcohol swabs, hydrogen peroxide, iodine, disinfectants, aspirin, Ibuprofen, Tylenol, gloves, thermometers, blood pressure cuffs, stethoscopes and diapers.

    Other Items

  • Sunday is St. Valentine’s Day, named after a priest who lived near Rome about the year 270 A.D., according to church tradition. It is a day on which lovers across the country express their love for each other by sending Valentine’s cards, presenting flowers, or offering candies.

    Cupid’s visit to Pun Alley left some lovely stories as well some others when Cupid was slinging pointy barbs instead of arrows.

    Appreciative Wife

  • Oak Run’s annual health fair will take place on Thursday, Oct. 29, from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. at Palm Grove. Come find out about many services, groups, facilities and professionals. Florida’s Blood Centers will have a bloodmobile on site for those who wish to get into (or back into) blood donation. The bloodmobiles will also be at Palm Grove on Nov. 4 and 5 at the regular times.

    Ambassadors’ Arts and Crafts Sale and Luncheon

  • Cherrywood Craft Show is Saturday

    The November Craft Show will be Saturday, Nov. 14, from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m.

  • Master the Possibilities classes available

    We all know someone who does nothing but complain. If it’s hot out, they wish for it to be cold. The problem is that when it’s cold their thoughts are on how nice warmth would be. If they have to remain home waiting for a repairman, they sulk and think of all the places they could be. When they are free to go anywhere they wish, they can’t come up with how to spend that time.

  • Months and months of hard work will come to fruition this weekend for members of Christ’s Church of Marion County.

     

    On Saturday, Feb. 13, members will host an open house from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sunday, the new sanctuary will be dedicated, said Bridget Harmon, church secretary.

    Sunday is also the first day for a new pastor, Ryan Loucks.

    Dedication of the 1,600-square-foot, 450-seat worship center will follow the 11 a.m. contemporary service, Harmon said. The contemporary service, on Feb 14, is also a first for the congregation.

  • February is the month for remembering presidents. We’ve always had Washington’s and Lincoln’s birthdays; in 1971 Presidents Day was proclaimed to honor all past United States presidents. Naturally, Pun Alley has to take a stab at some presidential and political stories, beginning with our first president.

  • A gentle mist enveloped the beautifully landscaped grounds of Sholom Park in Ocala as members of Congregation Beth Israel of Ocala observed Tu Bishvat, Jewish Arbor Day, by planting a tree on Monday, Feb. 1.

    About 25 members and guests attended the ceremony led by Judi Siegal, president. The special ceremony began with an original prayer especially written for the occasion by Judi Siegal and concluded with the congregants reading selections from Jewish tradition. The tree is located in the labyrinth section of the park.

  • 145 people gathered together on January 17, 2010 to celebrate the 20th anniversary of the congregation of Joy Lutheran Church on SR 200 in Ocala. They began by singing the song “We Are United in Christ” as written by a former church member, Ilona Haltula-Arntzen, who is now deceased.

  • Last Wednesday marked the 130-year anniversary of when Thomas Edison was awarded the patent for the incandescent light. Back then people didn’t trust this new way of making light, so Edison went around the country installing lights in different towns in order to drum up publicity.

    While in Oklahoma, Edison stopped by an Indian reservation and offered to put lights in any building they wanted. After much thought the Indian chief decided that he wanted lights in his outhouse. This made Edison the first man to wire a head for a reservation.

    Delighted

  • The recent cold weather here and extensive snow up north provide very good reasons to stay indoors and curl up with a good book. Perhaps that’s why January is known as the Book Blitz month, according to the Internet site, Bizarre, Crazy, Silly Unknown Holidays. Our travel down Pun Alley today stops at the nearest library to see what tales we can find.

    Computer Literate

  • Tarpon Springs is much more than just the picturesque waterfront road lined with docked sponge boats, shops and restaurants we visited on these pages a few months ago. It’s the same 90-miles from our Corridor by way of your favorite route to U.S. 19 and on south ’til you turn off on Alternate 19 just below SR 54 and the town of Holiday. Dodecanese Boulevard will still be just over the Anclote River bridge. But this trip, let’s keep on going beyond that turnoff. Alternate 19 soon becomes Pinellas Boulevard as you spot the St.

  • If you’re familiar with the Marion County Parks and Recreation Department, you might know its unofficial motto, “It starts in parks.” In addition to the ubiquitous activities that occur at these parks, though, something else is happening at the department – a rising in the ranks of one staff person to statewide status.

  • Judaism Goes Green

  • The eighth annual Health and Wellness Expo will be on Saturday, Jan. 16, at the Circle Square Cultural Center from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. Come and see what Ocala has to offer in the field of healthcare and learn the latest in medical advances. This is free event.

  • About three weeks ago the first snowstorm of the winter did a major dump on the East Coast. Then the Midwest got its share of ice and snow. News about these storms has reached Pun Alley.

    In Washington, D.C. they called it the city’s biggest snow job since the health care bill.

    Police everywhere said there would’ve been traffic jams if people still had jobs to go to.

    A sign on a northern nudist camp gate was changed to “Clothed For The Winter.”

  • Quick! Go outside and see if the daffodils you planted last summer are coming up. They should be about ready to begin setting their flower stalks. Did you plant them among other perennials as was suggested, so the leaves could be left to wither without looking ugly? Remember, the leaves must stay undisturbed after the flowers fade in order to feed the plant for next year’s bloom. Their lovely yellow or white color is so delightful among all the green and brown of winter.