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Features

  • Children planning to attend kindergarten during the upcoming 2010-2011 school year can register early at their local elementary school.

    Again this year, parents can complete and print an online form to bring with them when registering their child at school. Doing so will save lots of time in the waiting line. This form is available under the “Student Enrollment” option in the “Parent Information” tab at www.marion.k12.fl.us, the district’s website.

  • We read that the economy is recovering. But Greece’s money is slipping and the oil spill is killing the recovery and everything under the sea. The economy is certainly having its ups and downs, probably caused by all the financial yo-yos.

    President Obama said the federal government can no longer spend taxpayers’ money like its monopoly money. Especially since monopoly money is now more valuable than the dollar.

    Stock Market Report

  • When a Jewish group of people get together to form a congregation, one of the first things they plan for is the acquisition of a new Torah. (The Five Books of Moses in scroll form, considered sacred to Jews) This often takes many months or even years of planning because hand written scrolls can cost thousands of dollars. Sometimes, if the congregation is lucky, a congregant will come forward and donate the Torah either in memory or honor of a loved one or an auspicious event they might want to commemorate.

  • Today marks the end of National Police Week. We usually see police as we travel along State Road 200, the backbone of the corridor that plays a large part in our daily activities. Many travel between home and stores while others use the highway as a way between home and work.

    We should always be courteous to other drivers, even if they are wrong; it’s better than to be dead right. Traveling down Pun Alley gets us to some arresting stories.

    Cover Up

    Jen was speeding along Highway 200 on her way home from shopping when the police car pulled up next to her.

  • On Sunday we celebrate Mother’s Day to show honor and respect to one of the most influential persons in our lives. We all spent the most formative years of our lives with our mothers. Now, as we look back we realize that many things about moms were amusing, if not downright funny.

    Our amble down the Alley starts with mother’s profound teachings.

    My Mother taught me about anticipation: “Just wait until your father gets home.”

  • Today is an important anniversary for Louisiana. In 1803 France sold Louisiana and adjoining lands to the United States as part of the Louisiana Purchase. In 1812 Louisiana became the 18th state in the United States. Pun Alley takes to the bayous and swamps for today’s tales.

    Swamped with good luck

  • His very name is the stuff that legends are made of. Bar Kochba, son of a star. “A star rises from Jacob” (Numbers 24:17), a messiah, a savior for Israel.

    The year is 132 CE. The Romans again have imposed tyrannical rule over the province of Judea. Jews are forbidden to practice circumcision, Roman promises of a Temple rebuilt have gone unfulfilled and the people long for sovereignty in their own land. The mood is ripe for rebellion and with the people behind him, Bar Kochba rises to the occasion in open rebellion against the might of Rome.

  • Sounds of “Take Me Out to The Ball Game” have recently permeated the airwaves signifying the beginning of the baseball season. On this day in 1954, Hank Aaron hit the first of his 755 home runs. With baseball in mind, your Pun Alley writer takes to the plate to try to make some hits for you.

    Shocking

    Several years ago the Washington Nationals, with the worst record in baseball, fired their manager. Usually for results that bad in Washington you don’t get fired; you get re-elected.

    Strike Out

  • Sally Dussler said she was “flabbergasted” that a place where she had lived for just about a week would throw her a big party for her 101st birthday.

    But that was the case at Quiet Oaks Assisted Living on Monday afternoon when the Pennsylvania native and former New Jersey resident was honored, just two days after she hit that milestone.

  • Tomorrow is Husband Appreciation Day, according to the Internet site, Bizarre, Crazy, Silly Unknown Holidays. Even though husbands are often the blunt of jokes and are blamed for many things, the smart wife knows how to celebrate this holiday.

  • Much has been written about the State of Israel lately, some good, some bad. As with other countries of the world, the media like to play up certain aspects and leave some of the others in the dark. As Israel begins to celebrate its 62nd year of statehood on April 19, I would like to propose a few reasons, not in any particular order, why having a state of Israel is so important for not only Jews, but for the world at large.

  • Next Thursday, April 15, is the day of national reckoning when your income tax is due. Not only does our income get taxed, but also our minds in trying to fill out all those IRS forms. It seems appropriate that the month begins with April Fool’s Day and ends with cries of “May Day!” Tread lightly; the Alley is full of tax.

    Deli-cious

  • The members voted to open membership in the Jewish Social Club to all Oak Run residents. Everyone is invited to come join and enjoy the club's many great entertainments and events. May 5 will be Cabaret Night featuring Lori Forman, "On Broadway." Tickets will be on sale at the Orchid Club on April 15 and April 20 from 9 a.m. to 11 a.m. at a cost of $5. Tickets will be available on the night of the performance at a cost of $7.

  • Our third monthly birthday party, which honored residents born during March, attracted nearly three dozen birthday girls and boys, spouses or significant others. The festivities were hosted by MC Liz Herrick, from the sponsoring Social and Recreations Committee. Providing refreshments, cake and ice cream were Virginia DiNoto, Mary Dwyer, Ellen McGrath, Pat Smith and Janice Wood. Everyone was given two Bingo cards with Mary Lippo claiming the first win and Lou Russo taking the second Bingo. Marilee Hickman was accompanied for her grand finale by Kay Martens.

  • Parents interested in enrolling their children in Florida Virtual School’s Connections Academy, an online education option, may attend an informational meeting on Tuesday, April 13, at Marion Technical Institute’s Student Union located at 1614 S.E. Fort King St. in Ocala. The meeting starts at 7 p.m.

  • I just finished reading an article that makes a lot of sense. It is suggested that we eliminate clutter that is both inside and out so as to Spring Clean our Life.

  • Nancy Solomon is a special person in Palm Cay. Her love of our community is seen by her involvement in many activities.

    Presently, she is president of the Homeowner’s Board. This job keeps her very busy as all past presidents can attest to. She also served as vice president of the board.

    She coordinates and schedules activities in the Clubhouse. She keeps a yearly calendar of events and posts these on the bulletin board in the Clubhouse. This is an important job because it allows for maximum use of the facilities and minimizes conflicts of the space.

  • Cherrywood Democratic Club will hold an open house meeting on Friday, April 16 at 2 p.m. in the Clubhouse card room. Everyone is welcome. Refreshments will be served.

    This month we welcome Mrs. Mary Williams, candidate for the Marion County School Board District 5.

    We ask that you remember our young people serving our country and if you are able to make a donation toward their needs you may do this through our secretary to active service personnel now serving in Iraq. Your donations will be gratefully appreciated.

  • They were hidden away in dank, dark cellars; earthen tombs of despair. They lived in closets or cupboards with false swinging fronts like clothes out of season, hidden from view; mothballed from the world. They slept in barns, woods, attics, hoping it was not the final rest and that a crying child would not give away their secret. It was a time when the world was turned upside down with madness and hatred. Even in the darkness of these terrible times, there were those who stepped up and did the right thing and helped to save countless Jewish lives during the Nazi reign of terror.

  • Sunday is Easter, an important day for Christians as they commemorate the resurrection of their savior, Jesus Christ, after his crucifixion on Good Friday. It’s also a fun day for children as they get baskets from the Easter Bunny and go on Easter egg hunts. Our travel down Pun Alley brings us some Easter and rabbit tales.

    Missing